“What grade is your daughter in?"

Why must people become so wrapped up in their own mindset, their own frame of reference that they can't see that there could be any other way of truth and value? My mom used to say, “Their mind is made up, don't confuse them with facts.” As a homeschooler, I encounter people like that all the time, although not nearly as often as I used to. When I started homeschooling 16 years ago, it happened daily but nowadays it is more like a few times a year. Of course, if I go to the NEA website, it happens much more frequently;o)

Here's what got me to thinking about this subject; someone asked me what grade Harmoni was in. Simple question, right? But is it? My answer was, “She isn't.” Completely bumfuzzled them. How I answer this common question depends a lot on who is asking and why... and my mood. Some people might get, “Well, lets see, she is 12 so I guess that is about 6th or 7th grade, right?” To some I would say, “Well, it depends on which subject you are talking about; anywhere from 5th grade to college.” But the real, true answer is, “She isn't.” Hello? Homeschooler!

People don't seem to understand that the system most of us were raised in isn't the only way. The more you diverge from traditional “public school” methodology, the more difficulty people have accepting it. There are even a lot of homeschoolers who look down their noses at anyone who doesn't use desks and textbooks and gradebooks with a red pen. I have tried to explain to some people (the ones who were worth the effort) that grade level is simply a useful construct for the public school system to function. (At least that is an arguable point; I won't go into why I don't really believe that it is in this post.) But what does “grade level” mean in real terms? Of what use is it to a homeschooler unless they are basically doing school at home? Grade level is an arbitrary label applied to make things easier for school administrators. Period. I have exactly two students at this point in time. I manage to keep things rolling without those labels. The only reason I could have for using them is to compare my children with the children of other people who are around the same age. That serves no useful purpose to me. I am much more concerned with whether or not my girls are setting and reaching goals in a relevant and timely manner.

I don't assign grade levels to my girls. We figure out what our goals are. We ask ourselves what useful and worthy things are there to learn? “If there is anything virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy, we seek after these things.”[1] We ask what things will make us feel culturally literate and what things will move us toward our goals. Then we work on achieving those goals. At a certain point, usually the early to mid-teens, getting into college hopefully becomes one of those goals. (Bear in mind that I have already graduated two homeschooled kids as well as one who went through public school.) At that point, we start looking at what is required to achieve that goal. The materials we use may have “grade levels” attached but that still has very little meaning to us in any real and useful way.

Here's an example. Gini is 15. She does not enjoy algebra. She and algebra have a hate-hate relationship. She mastered all the basics of arithmetic and some pre-algebra but when she hit algebra, she stuttered to a stop. She hasn't progressed much mathematically since she was about 13. Two things have happened to start her engine again. First, her little sister has caught up to her and is still going strong. Awkward! Second, she started thinking about going to college. And she doesn't just want to go to any old local college where we could help pay her way. No she wants to go to BYU Hawaii. Big dream. Big money. She better get one heck of a good SAT score. We looked up some information about what level of math she would have to master to get the kind of SAT score she would need to get into BYU Anywhere and especially to qualify for some kind of scholarship. I mean, have you looked at out of state tuition costs??? Anywhere, much less Hawaii???? Well, I have told them to shoot for the stars....

Now, please notice; did grade level come up in that topic at all? No. Did it need to? No. She needs to master a couple more levels of Algebra as well as some more advanced Geometry and Trig. And she needs to do it in the next year or two. Is she trying to go from an 8th grade level to an 11th grade level in a year and a half? No, she is learning a logical sequence of math skills that she needs in order to get a really good score on a specific test. Did I mention that she is interested in Veterinary Science? Yeah. Math and science heaven also known as pre-vet. (By the way Gini, OSU ROCKS for Vet Science!)

And, for the record, I have actually sat in classes at Oklahoma State University next to people who were functioning and getting by even though I knew for a fact that their math skills were still at an "8th grade level". Were they still "in 8th grade?" I tutored for my work-study money. I'm not making this up. The public schools are graduating people with less math skills that Gini has right now. Worse, in my opinion, is the fact that they are graduating people who can't outread the average ten year old and don't know the names of all the continents. So grade level begins to mean even less in that light, eh?

Now because I know this will be a question in the minds of some people, yes, I could have pushed her and prodded her and punished her through Algebra. After all, it was done to me. But I chose instead to have faith in her and in her Father's plans for her. I knew that when she came to realize that the math mattered that she would learn it much more quickly and joyfully than she would if I forced her into it. And our home and relationship would be more joyful as well. How many moms describe their relationship with their 15 year old as “joyful”? Well, I do. We have a really wonderful, loving, and yes, joyful relationship. And, guess what, I also have no doubt that she will go to college. Whether or not finances will allow her to go to Hawaii I can't say; that is several years away in a very uncertain economy. She understands that. She knows that she may end up at OSU or even local community college if finances dictate that. But I have no doubt that she will master the math now that she has set her mind to it and neither does she. With no clue whatsoever what grade level she is on, she will master Algebra, Geometry and Trigonometry. And she will take the SAT by storm. And even if she is a “year late” taking the SAT and even if she has to settle for OSU (my alma mater), she will become a fabulous veterinarian. She certainly has a gift with animals. Oh, and they won't care what grade level she achieved either;o)


[1] from 13th Article of Faith of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints

Whoever controls the children owns the future. Hitler knew it, the humanists know it and the modern left extremists know it.

My homeschooling friend, Liz E., sent me a link to a very interesting article and video at WorldNetDaily. It was in reference to a website called www.ExodusMandate.com and to a call that is being put out to Christians to pull their children out of government run schools. The video especially was very interesting. Voddie Baucham, a minister and author of the book, "Family Driven Faith" mentioned that children spend 14000 seat hours in school from K-12. Fourteen thousand hours! He said, "Whoever controls those 14,000 hours controls our childrens' worldview." That is pretty powerful. Baucham also quoted Charles Potter, a signer of "The Humanist Manifesto: "What can theistic Sunday School, meeting for an hour each week, do to stem the tide of a five day program of humanistic teaching?" Not much. That is what the humanistic, atheistic popular culture pushers are counting on.

And MAKE NO MISTAKE folks. The public schools are absolutely in the business of humanistic teaching. There are still those who want to keep their heads in the sand and think that their school is okay or that their children will follow their example no matter how many hours they are exposed to a pervasive culture of humanistic views and condemnation and ridicule of Christian views and teachings. An adult would have a hard time maintaining their beliefs if surrounded day in and day out, all day long by authority figures who communicate with everything they say and do that their beliefs were naive and somehow ridiculous, oh and hateful, Christian beliefs are hateful too doncha know. It would be extremely difficult for an adult to do and yet we expect it of little children from the age of 5! No, wait... we put them into headstart and 4 year old Kindergarten nowadays so make that from the age of 3. We are, hopefully and prayerfully, training them up in the way they should go but they are NOT TRAINED YET. They are so teachable in those early years. It is a beautiful thing how teachable a little child is... until you consider what they are being taught.

This video, "The Call to Dunkirke" was a very straight-forward, pull-no-punches challenge to Christian parents. Let's face it, the public schools are very tolerant places... to everyone except Christians. The mention of Jesus is taboo, kids can't say a prayer over their lunch, they sure to heck can't read their Bible in study hall. Nowadays, they can't even make signs that say, Merry Christmas or sing Silent Night in the "Holiday" program. The songs relating to Santa and lots of gifts are fine, I'm sure.

I about choked and then cried out aloud "Amen!" when Minister Baucham said, "...the first place we need to march is right out the front door of those Christ dishonoring, academically inferior, soul-killing government indoctrination centers!" Wow. The days of homeschooler apologetics is over folks. It's time to put it plainly and truthfully. Public schools are not doing the job they spend millions and millions of dollars to purportedly do. The only thing they are really efficient at is indoctrinating the children in the mores and morals (or lack thereof) of popular culture. I am very proud to say that my 2 youngest girls never stepped foot into a government run classroom and as long as America is still the land of the free, they never will.

Reflecting on all of this has made me aware of how thankful I am for the relaxed days of learning and teaching and growing with my girls. Those 14,000 hours are spent in an atmosphere of love and faith and learning. I've thought before about how people are losing more and more of their children's time to the government nannies. I watched a video about the "two million minutes" kids spend in high school and got to thinking that if my kids were in public school, I would be in their company for maybe 3 or 4 hours a day M-F. And honestly, those are some of the busiest hours of the day in most households. The hour or so getting everyone around to go to school and work in the morning and the hours from 5 or 6 pm to bedtime getting supper made and eaten and baths and everything ready for the next day. How much of that time is spent conveying our deeply held beliefs about God and country?

In comparison, the breakfast hour is very relaxed around here and yes, we absolutely do talk about things like freedom and faith every single day. The dinner hour to bedtime is pretty busy around here too, but that's okay because there were preceded by several hours of reading and writing and discussing things at our leisure. Mr Potter was correct folks. Like it or not, a few hours a week of our good example is not going to compete with 40 or more hours a week of being completely submerged in a humanist atmosphere. It just is not. There are some blessed families who will pull their kids through the fire with diligence and faith but I'm not up for playing russian roulette with my childrens' futures. How about you?

SOCIALIZATION AGAIN... AND AGAIN AND AGAIN AND....

When I first began homeschooling in 1992, people often expressed doubt about my sanity. Can you really teach your own child? But you didn't finish your degree! Boy, I'd go crazy if my kids were all home all the time!!! I was made to feel like there was something wrong with the fact that I loved being with my children and that I was arrogant to think I could handle the education of my (then) 8 year old son. Well, I figured I managed third grade just fine so it was worth a try;o) Actually, that is a whole, long 'nother story. Nowadays there are few who really question whether or not homeschooling can turn out well educated people; it has been proven time and again that it can and does. My topic today is socialization.I doubt there is a homeschooler on the planet who hasn't been asked, "Aren't you worried about socialization?" Frequently it is asked in a genuinely concerned tone while at other times it is more of an accusation. It took years for me to get through that question without flinching.I went through phases. At first, I would be intimidated. I would fumble around talking about how hard I was going to work at making sure Cameron was exposed to lots of activities with other kids. Then came the defensive/annoyed phase. Oh for pete's sake; you don't really think that kids are gaining anything valuable inthat area in public school do you? Puhlease! Lately, though, I think I have evolved. By golly, I may get all mature and stuff yet;o) Actually, what I got was educated on the subject.Hmmm, educated; yes, I learned something. I read and studied the writings of many different people on different sides of the education question. I studied the roots of American public education and its goals. And I didn't take a class to do it; I did it on my own because I had a desire to understand the subject. But I digress;o) Nowadays when I am asked about socialization, I ask a question of my own. What, exactly, do you mean by socialization? I ask this question in all sincerity; I'm not being sarcastic or snotty. The definition of socializationis thus:socializationA noun1 socialization, socialisation, acculturation, enculturation; the adoption of the behavior patterns of the surrounding culture[from WordReference.com]May I also submit the definition of socialism:socialismA noun1 socialism: a political theory advocating state ownership of industryNow, the American education system was based on the Prussian system which was unabashedly formed to create good little socialist citizens. Noone pretended that independent thought or individuality was of any importance whatsoever. True academics were discouraged except for an elite few - about 8% of the children. Might socialization viewed in this light be seen as advocating the "state ownership" of our children? When we also consider the atmosphere and "behavior patterns" found in most public schools today, if I am asked if I wish my children to be encultured to the behavior patterns of the average public school, I answer no without apology.The thing I've come to realize is that most people mean something entirely different. And if they ask the question sincerely, I am happy to discuss it with them. What most people are concerned about is that kids who don't go to public school will never learn a) how to get along with their peers and b) to deal with adversity. I'll deal with these one at a time.First, we have getting along with peers. Well, I suppose we have to define peers first.peern 1: a person who is of equal standing with another in a group[syn: equal, match, compeer][from dict.die.net]Okey-dokey. Next, we must ask ourselves who are our child's peers? As far as their age-mates in the public schools, suffice it to say that my children are, thankfully, not of equal standing with them. They really feel very little in common or comradeship with many of those kids. Is that bad? Nope. Thank you Jesus. If there are age-mates around who share their values and morals, they are more likely to find them at church or at interest based activities such as leadership clubs, 4-H, scouting, rodeos, drama and improv troupes and singing groups among many others, not to mention the many sports and interest groups formed especially for homeschoolers.But are peers necessarily age-mates? Again, nope! I love being around homeschooled kids. When they are young, they are quite likely to be very exuberant and energetic. In other words, they would probably drive a classroom teacher crazy. But they are so much closer to what children really should be. Children are built to learn by doing and while on the move. But, again, that is another subject.As they get a little older, homeschoolers are just as likely to identify with elderly neighbor who teaches them to tie flies as they are the skateboarder on the next block. I've sat in quilting bees with grandmothers, young mothers and homeschooled kids. They chatted and had a blast. Do you think the public schoolers would consider this cool? Probably not. But who is better "socialized" in terms of society and the world?There is a misconception that young homeschoolers are never exposed to anyone other than the people in their parents' church. I find this to be very rarely true. We are devout Christians but we are friends with people who are Muslim, Pagan, Jewish etc. There are many different "peer groups" out there. I think the tragedy is that the average public school student is given such a narrow view of what his should be. Most public schooled kids are into their own little clicks of kids who are their same age, race, religion, economic background, etc. Who is better"socialized" in terms of a country commonly referred to as a melting pot?The second concern out there is that homeschooled children will not learn to deal with adversity. This is the one that leads to such brilliant observations as, "Kids will never learn to say no to drugs if they don't go to school where the drug dealers are" and "he'll never learn to stand up for himself if he never deals with the bullies in school." Alrighty then. I firmly believe that if I raise my child to love and respect his fellowman and to expect the same and to know that he deserves the same - as any child of God does - then when he is confronted with adversity, he will deal with it in a mature and responsible way. Period.We put these kids out there on their own for so many hours of their day from such a young age (and getting younger every year - 3 year old kindergarten anyone? Oh wait, that is called Head Start) that many of them become beaten down and confused before they ever reach an age or maturity level sufficient to stand for their convictions. By the time they go to school, do their homework, eat their supper and bathe, their parents don't have any time with them. So how are they to instill all the confidence, hope, faith and trust that they need to deal with those issues? We are, in essence, turning our children over to the teachers. There are many wonderful people in the teaching profession but conservative or individualistic values are given no quarter in public schools so parents who hold those values dear are fighting an uphill battle to pass them on. So the kids are left with confusing, conflicting views at a very young and impressionable age. Trial by fire is not a great philosophy when dealing with young children's lives.I saw a woman on Oprah one day who had seen the devastating effects of the public school attitude toward peer relations and bullying. Her son had been bullied for years, very badly at times. The school just seemed to think that the boy needed to learn to deal with it. The woman came in one day and found her son dead at his own hand. He had blown his face off with a gun. She said, "his outside finally matched the way he had been feeling on the inside all those years." How horrifying. But I will never forget what she said when Oprah asked her if there was anything she wished she had done differently. She said she wished she had taken him out of the school. She didn't really realize that she even had that right.So is socialization a problem that homeschoolers need to address? No, socialization is an issue that every parent had best give some serious time and thought to if they want their children to be "encultured to adopt the behavior patterns" of the kind of people they want their children to be. And you might want to take a long hard look at the culture that exists in their school. It is a whole different world than it was even ten years ago. Is it a culture that you wish your child to become encultured to? If not, do you really want them spending a minimum of 40 hours per week immersed in it?

Here is a little teaser from Harmoni's book. I have left her spelling and usage errors in since we haven't "edited" this section yet. I use her mistakes to teach grammar, spelling, etc.


ch 18 THE DUEL

As they disapeared Katie felt a pang of sadness and regret. As she turned to find Bobby she ran into jennifer. "Jennifer, have you seen Bobby?"she asked.

"Yes he's in the practice ring." Jennifer replied.

"Thank you".

She ran down the hall, she ran until she came to a dead end. "What...what is happening?" she asked herself.

"It is simple,"came familiar voice.

"Mike"she whispered.

"yes, thats right katie, I did this."

"why?"

So we could have a private fight."

"Alright, we will,"

"Good, get her a sword."

Clank. She turned around and there he was, just standing there wearing the false kings symbol. She took a deep breath and picked up the sword. You can do this Katie, you can.

Now, this is an 11 year old who didn't learn to read on her own until she was 8 1/2. She loved being read to, still does, but she just didn't care about reading. She was much more interested in numbers and music so I left her alone. Just when Dad and I were beginning to feel our commitment to following her natural learning rhythms, she decided she was ready to read on her own. Within a year, she was reading everything in sight up through junior high level. I really think her primary motivation for wanting to read was because she had all these amazing stories in her head and she wanted to be able to get them written down. Don't get me wrong, she doesn't write like an adult. But she sure writes like a pretty darn clever and imaginative 11 year old8o)

And while we are on the subject of Harmoni, the kid is growing like Jack's beanstalk!! She is now 5'7" and is outgrowing her size 12 shoes! I'm so sick of her having to wear ugly old mens' socks that I've decided to knit her some pretty socks. Socks are not my favorite thing to knit but by golly my little girl is going to have some socks that look like little girl socks once in a while!